Sunday, July 26, 2015

Grantland's NFL Top 100: Let Me Clean Up This Mess

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As of this second, Grantland is featuring part two of Bill Barnwell's NFL Top 100 piece on its homepage (this was part one). It has been front and center since Friday; so either the guys don't work on the weekends or the editing staff is particularly fond of the article. I hope the latter isn't the case because the rankings are completely and utterly illogical. 

I totally understand the fact that Barnwell feels skill players are unfairly overrated -- and I certainly think that offensive and defensive linemen and other un-flashy players deserve their due -- but you can't be ranking tight ends ahead of running backs simply because you believe tight ends don't get enough attention. For example:

1. Barnwell has TE Delanie Walker (#97) ranked ahead of RB DeMarco Murray (#100). 

I almost shut down my computer when I read this. I very nearly gave up on Barnwell's article altogether. This is how he opens his paragraph about Walker:

"Regarded as one of the league’s best blocking tight ends during his time as Vernon Davis’s backup in San Francisco..."

And to that I say, "Yipde do." The guy was one of the best blockers when he was on the 49ers? He's not even on the 49ers anymore! What is that statement implying, that Walker isn't one of the best blocking tight ends anymore? That he was only one of the best blockers then? How is that a selling point?

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He's ranking a guy who used to be a good blocking tight end over the powerful and dynamic bellcow who led the NFL in rushing attempts, yards (total and per game), touchdowns and total yards from scrimmage. 

HOW ILLOGICAL IS THAT? I know it's rare for a running back, but I actually thought Murray deserved to be MVP of the league last season. I felt multiple quarterbacks were in the discussion -- namely Aaron Rodgers, Tom Brady, Tony Romo, Andrew Luck and Ben Roethlisberger -- but no other running back was in Murray's class. He was absolutely the class of his position. 

And trust me, I completely understand that the Cowboys boasted the most improved offensive line in the game last year. I watched almost all of their games. I saw some of the ridiculously large holes that opened up. I take nothing away from them -- but I also saw Murray punishing linebackers and safeties in the second level. I also saw the stars of the vaunted Seattle Seahawks' defense, already considered one of the best in the history of football, shaking in their boots as Murray ran them over for 115 yards and a touchdown in a 30-23 Cowboys victory AT SEATTLE. The toughest place to play in the league. 

I really could go on all day about this. It's just such a completely ridiculous ranking that I feel no need to continue justifying my opinion. Barnwell's simply overthinking things in this case. 

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2. Barnwell has Jason Witten (#79) ahead of Elvis Dumervil (#83) and Mario Williams (#85).

It just dawned on me that this guy was probably a tight end in high school or something. I mean, the favoring of tight ends is blatant. Witten played all 16 games last season and had just 703 yards receiving! I know he's a reliable veteran, but he's also slow as shit. Anyone who actually watches the games can see the obvious decline in his physical ability. He is not a dynamic player. He's another good blocker. Also, since he's still fresh in mind, how the hell is Witten better than DeMarco Murray? Murray is younger, they were on the same team last season and Murray was the MVP of the team. Witten is old and slow. Murray is a truck disguised as a human being. How is this even a discussion?

As for Dumervil and Williams, we're clearly talking about two of the most explosive pass rushers in the world. Dumervil was third in sacks and Super Mario was fourth. Most football people agree that the key to a world-class defense is consistent pressure on the opposing quarterback. Both Dumervil and Williams play for top defensive units in the Ravens and Bills, respectively. These guys are INCREDIBLY valuable. They are relentless monsters in the trenches. At this stage in his career, Witten is a solid role player and nothing more. 

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3. Barnwell has CB Chris Harris ahead of Jimmy Graham, Clay Matthews, Le'Veon Bell and Jamaal Charles. 

DO I EVEN HAVE TO F'N SAY ANYTHING? IS THIS EARTH? I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE. 

Sunday, July 5, 2015

Winners and Losers of the NBA Offseason: Spurs Grab Top Prize In Aldridge

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I think most would agree that it's been a very bizarre NBA offseason. Many players had to make tough decisions because of the upcoming changes to the salary cap, and organizations had similarly difficult decisions to make. With that being said, let's take a look at my winners and losers:

LOSER: Dallas Mavericks
Added: DeAndre Jordan and Wesley Matthews
Lost: Monta Ellis and Rajon Rondo

I think this "Loser" label will come as a surprise to some. Here's my problem with the Mavs' offseason: They added two of the most highly sought after players -- DeAndre and Wes Matthews -- but they didn't dramatically improve their position in the brutally competitive Western Conference. 

Many of you already know my stance on DeAndre; he's one of the best rebounders and off-the-ball shotblockers in the NBA, but he has no game. I don't place immense value on players with no game. He has no post ability, cannot make a short or mid-range jumper and cannot make free throws. He has no touch. His buckets need to be spoon fed to him. Taking that into consideration, how is he going to fare without Chris Paul? He's going from CP3 to JJ Barea and possibly Jeremy Lin. Talk about two completely different stratospheres. Long and short of it is, DeAndre's not the guy to get this team over the top. 

On the other hand, I think letting Monta Ellis go was a critical mistake. He was far and away their best offensive player this past season, and playing for superb head coach Rick Carlisle, Monta really improved his passing and unselfishness in recent years. To me, he was the engine of the Mavs' offense. Dirk is still solid, but aging to the point where he is not a go-to, franchise-type offensive player. This means Chandler Parsons is really going to have to be a primary playmaker for this team. That ain't gonna cut it in the West. 

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As for Matthews, I am definitely a fan. I really wanted the Knicks to get him, but he wouldn't even grant them a meeting (and who could blame him?). The problem is that Wes is primarily a catch-and-shoot offensive player who is best suited to play alongside a playmaking, drive-and-kick point guard. The Mavs have failed to properly address that position. I don't think Wes can reach his maximum value with the Mavs constructed as they are. 

This kind of feels like a mismatched group of random parts. After this offseason, I do not view the Mavs as a legitimate threat in the West. 

WINNER: San Antonio Spurs
Added: LaMarcus Aldridge
Lost: Tiago Splitter and Marco Belinelli

I mean, this is really a no-brainer. Any time you subtract a detrimental player like Splitter while adding a superstar like Aldridge, your organization is a big-time winner. Coach Pop and the Spurs were also able to lock up Kawhi Leonard and Danny Green for the future, so they basically just killed it all the way around. In my opinion, even though the Warriors won the championship, I still feel like the Spurs were the most cohesive and well-oiled team in the playoffs. I honestly felt like they fell victim to horribly bad luck, catching the Clippers in the best series they have ever played, not to mention a one-legged game winner by CP3 in Game 7. Ouch. 

Anyway, this offseason makes the Spurs the favorites to win it all. In addition, Pop, Duncan, Parker and Ginobili can use the next couple of seasons to groom Aldridge for the future. My only concern is that "LA" likes to get the lion's share of shot attempts, so he'll have to work on his consistent willingness to pass when necessary. The Spurs certainly have the personnel to help him with that. 

LOSER: Portland Trail Blazers
Added: Mason Plumlee, Gerald Henderson, Al-Farouq Aminu and Ed Davis
Lost: LaMarcus Aldridge, Wesley Matthews and Nicolas Batum

Yikes. Not much really needs to be said here. They lost three of their four best players and added a pile of mediocre guys. Plumlee sucks, Henderson and Davis are okay and I actually like Aminu, but this is a clear all-around downgrade. This team is now one of the few Western squads that cannot contend for a playoff spot. The others are likely the Nuggets, Lakers and probably the T'Wolves, unless they emerge quicker than expected. 

WINNER: Sacramento Kings
Added: Rajon Rondo, Marco Belinelli, Kosta Koufos and Willie Cauley-Stein
Lost: Derrick Williams and Nik Stauskas

The saga continues. Can you imagine? A team with so much offseason turmoil, actually somehow improved? I think that's the case here. George Karl and DeMarcus Cousins may hate one another, but that doesn't change the fact that Rondo, Belinelli, Koufos and Cauley-Stein make this a much better team than last year. 

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I hate Rondo and I'm sure they'll be plenty of drama involving him, Karl and Cousins, but this is the right personnel for his skill set at this stage of his rapidly declining career. Cousins and Rudy Gay can create a lot on their own and don't require a point guard who can do an awful lot, except maybe get them the ball when the opposing defense has decided to overplay and deny them. That's one of the few things Rondo can actually do. He also somehow improves the team's depth, giving them two veteran (and not completely useless) players at the point guard position, the other of course being Darren Collison

Collison is definitely a better all-around player than Rondo at this stage in their respective careers, but I'm sure Rondo will get the starting job. This isn't necessarily a bad thing for the Kings because Collison is far more capable of carrying the second unit. 

I don't think the Kings will make the playoffs because they will be too dysfunctional on and off the court, but they will be better than last season. Thus, they are an offseason winner. 

WINNERS WITH ONE MOVE: Bucks and Pacers
Added: Greg Monroe and Monta Ellis, respectively

The Bucks may be the second-best team in the East heading into the the 2015-16 NBA season. People have already been fighting me on that contention with the conservative picks like the Bulls, Wizards, Hawks and Heat, but I really do believe Milwaukee will contend for the two-seed. They already gave the Bulls a tough series this past postseason, and now they'll have Monroe and Jabari Parker. This is a long, fast, hungry and well-coached squad. Monroe adds the offense and technical skill that they really needed. This was a huge pick up for an organization on the rise. 

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I've already spoken a bit about Ellis, so let's just say that the Pacers have really given themselves a chance by adding him. Of course everything in Indiana will boil down to Paul George's ability to stay healthy and (perhaps) return to form. Only time will tell in that case. 

TEAMS THAT WON BY BRINGING BACK (BASICALLY) THE SAME TEAM:

Cavs, Bulls, Warriors, Rockets, Grizzlies, Heat, Nets, Pelicans, Thunder and Jazz. 

I really love what GM David Griffin and the Cavs did this offseason. Instead of being completely results-oriented and saying, "We lost in the Finals, we really have to change things" he instead said, "We probably had the best team in the NBA as we were, and the Kyrie and K-Love injuries are what ultimately derailed us."

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And he would be correct in thinking that. Therefore, they brought back essentially the same team and should cruise to an easy repeat Eastern Conference championship. That's simple and smart organizational thinking. No one else in the East really has a chance.

TEAMS THAT LOST IN ONE EXCHANGE:

Atlanta Hawks: DeMarre Carroll downgrade to Tim Hardaway Jr

Detroit Pistons: Greg Monroe downgrade to Ersan Ilyasova

Los Angeles Clippers: DeAndre Jordan downgrade to no one. What are they doing? They are going to have to go all out for JaVale McGee now? Give me a friggin' break. They better hope Paul Pierce is an all-around savior. Sent from the heavens. And speaking of Paul Pierce...

Washington Wizards: Paul Pierce downgrade to Jared Dudley. They will need Dudley and Gary Neal to somehow collectively pick up the slack. Neal is the better player of the two. 

Ughhhhh, I had a whole 'nother section here that didn't save because I lost my Internet connection. I hit Control-C (copy) and tried to Control-V paste but nothing returned. I'm not writing it all again. Now I'm pissed. Fuck it, it was something like this:

-I love Brad Stevens and the evolution of the Celtics' culture, but they really didn't do much this offseason. I thought they really would have benefited from the addition of Greg Monroe. Also, they won't have the element of surprise this season in the Eastern Conference.

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-Michael Jordan's Hornets had a nice little offseason, adding Nicolas Batum and rookie Frank Kaminsky. I like the idea that they are going to throw Kaminsky right into the fire with big minutes and a lot of touches because they aren't a championship-caliber team. They are better off giving him the opportunity to learn on the fly during real professional game action. I can only hope Phil Jackson and Knicks will make similar decisions regarding rookies Kristaps Porzingis and Jerian Grant. They probably won't because they always do the wrong thing.

-Overall summary: The Hawks got worse, the Nets and Celtics stayed put, the Hornets got better, the Cavs and Bulls stayed put, the Mavs failed to improve, the Nuggets stayed put, the Pistons got worse, the Warriors and Rockets stayed put, the Pacers got better, the Clippers got worse, the Lakers are different but still shitty, the Grizzlies and Heat stayed put, the T'Wolves and Bucks got better, the Pelicans stayed put, the Knicks got better but still suck, the Thunder and Magic stayed put, the 76ers are a circus, the Suns failed to improve, the Blazers got worse, the Spurs, Kings and Raptors got better, the Jazz stayed put and the Wizards got worse.

-Number of Eastern teams that improved: 5 (Hornets, Pacers, Bucks, Knicks and Raptors)
-Number of Eastern teams that weakened: 3 (Hawks, Pistons, Wizards)
-Number of Western teams that improved: 3 (T'Wolves, Spurs and Kings)
-Number of Western teams that weakened: 2 (Clippers and Blazers)

8 teams improved, 5 teams got worse and the rest are status quo. That is your 2015 NBA offseason in a nutshell.